The Girls' Guide to Surviving a Break-Up The essential female companion from the first moment he walks out of your life! The Girls' Guide to Surviving a Break-Up offers step-by-step advice for getting over him.

The Hell with Love: Poems to Mend a Broken Heart Finally a book of poetry that describes every emotion you go through when you are in love and heart broken. This book is amazing and wonderful. I recommend it to who ever loves poetry and ever had a broken heart.

He's Just Not That Into You (The Newly Expanded Edition): The No-Excuses Truth to Understanding Guys It seems like everywhere you turn the phrase "He's just not that into you" is being thrown around. And for good reason! The ladies are finally done waiting by the phone - hey, why sit at home for the phone to ring when it's so obvious that he's just not that into you?

Women Men Love, Women Men Leave: What Makes Men Want to Commit? In easy psychological terms, this book helps a woman understand why a man may react negatively to her even when she feels she's doing everything right for a relationship. With different female personalities portrayed, the reader will find themselves fitting one or more of the profiles.

The Masks We Wear
by N.R. Davis
(Based on a post by CB, of the Lifted Hearts Community, our very own breakup support community here on the web)

My cat Joni is sitting on my lap, making my typing all the more difficult. I am an adequate typist normally, except when being weighed down by a soft, fuzzy little creme colored Tonkinese cat. Just now, she settled down even further, and then all of a sudden, the purring started. Out of nowhere, it just sort of rumbles out of her soft little chest. And as I Look down at her furry little perfect snout and face, there is no mistaking the look of pure, unadulterated contentment.

Or perhaps she is just bored at me typing away all the time, and is actually full of disdain for me. Cats can be like that sometimes; and that is the subject of this short work. How once again, I have gained some type of wisdom from my pets, and how the small suggestion of a cohort here has spurred on my imagination to expound upon the many faces that we all wear like masks.

How different we interpret the masks we wear in public. You can be in a mall, or a community event, or at the office or at a party. And everywhere you go, people are wearing one of the many faces at their disposal. Sometimes, they are wearing their happy face, or their concerned face, or their worried face, or their nondescript face. Sometimes, our masks are jubilant, and pained, some are amused, bemused, and confused. Mostly, our masks are put on haphazardly, and with not a great deal of thought beforehand.

And often, just as I have misinterpreted the look on my cat's face, so do we misread the masks of the people we see. That is the nature of masks. They hide, and conceal, and they intend to deceive, or to make the truth just a little more ambiguous. That is also the nature of the analog, or "real" world. The truth can be so ambiguous and convoluted sometimes.

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But here in the digital world, none of us wear masks. That is the beautiful part of this site, and this digital medium; its anonymity, and its forthrightness, and its truthfulness. Here, we can truly get out all of our inner angst, all of our sadness, grief, our befuddlement, our confusions, and despite all of that.....not a single mask in the place. How wonderful that, despite the masks we all put on every day for our jobs, our children, our families, and everybody else in the "real" world, we can take off our masks here, and simply be ourselves! Amazing that we have to go all the way to cyberspace to do that.

I for one find it refreshing and energizing. I feel fortunate to be able to be a part of this group, and to have my words actually read by other people. I never really thought of myself as a writer, but some people here have told me that I am one. So I guess I shall believe them for the moment. I guess if I am indeed wearing my mask here, I am wearing my writer mask. And I can live with that one for a while.

In public, we could be anywhere, and we could look like anyone else. In fact, you would be hard pressed to walk down the street, and talk to somebody who has NOT had their heartbroken by another. Despite the mask that the person was wearing, you could be sure that somewhere inside, they have experienced exactly what we here all feel, or have felt.

As my cohort here recently suggested to me, "you never can look into the person's soul," and I think that is so true, and it only reaffirms my belief of why this place is special; because here, not only do we each take off our masks, we also willingly bare our souls for each other. We risk ourselves here, we take chances, we expose our inner selves here, and we risk putting our stories on the line, all in the hopes of getting some good advice, and feeling better.

And I have found that while you are here, the more you bare your soul, and your life, and your trials and tribulations to this group, the chances are that someone here can and will help you.

Therefore, take off your mask right now. Post something. Anything. Or respond to another's post. But become involved in taking off your own mask, and jump in to this digital pool. Because if you found this place, you have something on your mind. And here, where we are so anonymous, it is impossible to misconstrue the look of another's mask. Because here, masks don't exist. Here, our souls exist in truthful and pure anonymity. Here, our souls exist without masks.

And here, souls never lie. You may find empathy here, or sympathy, or support, or inspiration, or humor, and sometimes, someone here will probably rough you up a little bit for you own good. They will question your motives and your behaviors and even your thoughts. But rest assured that you will live, and you will feel better. But you must be willing to take off your mask first, and participate, and do the work. But if you do all of that, you will feel better.

That is the beauty of this place. Plain and simple; here, in this place, masks don't exist.

Neil
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Tigress Luv , the Breakup Guru, is the author of How to STOP a Breakup, an instantly available webBook and website, or downloadable ebook, designed to help you STOP or reverse your break up and get your ex back, and How to Get Over a Breakup, also an instantly available online webBook and website, or ebook download, designed to help you understand and heal from a broken heart . Both are available on this site and are free when you join our breaking up help and support community.

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